care for a side of hypocrisy with that humble pie?

I've been exercising (though not to the gym ... due to this sick-to-my-stomach situation that doesn't seem to go away), and been reading - particularly in 1 Peter, as I get ready for the Monday night ladies' Bible study.

I've been thinking about sin lately. I know ... I know ... not a pleasant subject!

But nonethless, it's been on my mind.

As I mentioned in the last post, I've been listening in my car to a series of sermons on Romans by Charles Leiter (http://www.lakeroadchapel.org - I don't think the Romans series is posted, but some of his other messages are). He's mentioned several times the idea that the greatest sins are those we commit against God ... forgetting Him, choosing others above Him, etc.

Also this week, someone confessed something to me that I found shocking.

In praying about that situation, and considering the messages I'm listening to, it's had me examining my attitudes towards sin.

Why did I find the confession shocking? Because I think of some sins as worse than others. But my standards are so different from God's!

Actually, it's MY sins that are worst. Preoccupation, seeking entertainment, and focus on my "to do" list regularly put God at the back of my mind. I can go entire days without involving Him in my life.

The shame is MINE. My sins are persistent, and on-going, and rarely confessed or acknowledged.

This song, from Fernando Ortega's new CD, has been woven through my thinking on this:
(You can listen at: http://www.fernandoortega.com) It's talking not so much about the shame associated with sin, as that of just human-ness. However, it's figuring into my meditations on this subject in a way I haven't quite got a handle on just yet.

SHAME

Though I am weak
Sometimes weary
In times of trial
I hide my face
In the balance
Judge me wholly
Please don’t judge me
By my shame

In dark hours
Of confrontation
When words may fall
Too soon to unsay
Don’t mistake them
For my true meaning
They are measures
Of my shame

I have tried to
Live life humbly
Not a coward
Not in vain
When my meekness
Overcomes me
Remember me
Not my shame
Not my shame

I am small
And self-conscious
Every mirror
Reflects the grain
Judge my essence
By my kinships
Remember me
Not my shame

I am weak
Sometimes weary
Sometimes small
I hide away
When my hours
Are all accounted
Please don’t bind me
To my shame

I have tried to
Live life humbly
Not a coward
Not in vain
When my meekness
Overcomes me
Remember me
Not my shame
Not my shame(repeat)

In reality, it's purely the mercy of God that has kept me. That's it.

God, in His providence, chose to weave together circumstances in such a way that I didn't end up in this other one's shoes. The wall between me and shocking behavior is one God erected, and one that my heedlessness could tear down in a second, if He left me to myself.

Thankful for His protection, and desiring to be constantly reminded that it's He who is responsible for anything worthwhile in my life,

Trinka