what on earth are you doing up at 3:30 a.m.?

This is the question that I asked myself repeatedly last night ... unfortunately no answer was forthcoming! :)

But I was able to praise the Lord for how different this late-night wakefulness was when compared to instances in the past.

God has used "Love thinketh no evil" (or the converse ... "love thinks the best") from 1 Cor. 13 to make such a change in my thinking. And every now and then I get a picture of that change that's a blessing to me.

There was a season, not so many years ago, where I would be awake all night often, with my mind chasing around various perceived offenses, and re-writing conversations fromt that day, making scripts for the next day that I never seemed to have opportunity to use!

But God so graciously brought me out of that season of bitterness and hardness of heart, and last night was so different. Though I'd still prefer sleeping at night, the only monologue I had to listen to early this morning was,

"close your eyes you goofball ... or tomorrow is going to be a LONG day."

Well, today IS going to be a long day, but at least it doesn't carry with it the hang-over of a night spent wallowing in sinful thinking.

God is so good.

Exercise report: nothing yesterday. Prayer meeting makes Wednesdays a tough day to fit it in ... often I do, but yesterday I didn't. Tonight, I hope to do pilates after Bible study.

Trinka

now this man can write ...

From Samuel Rutherford's Letters:

Build your nest upon no tree here; for ye see God hath sold the forest to death; and every tree whereupon we would rest is ready to be cut down, to the end we may fly and mount up, and build upon the Rock, and dwell in the holes of the Rock.

What ye love besides Jesus, your husband, is an adulterous lover. Now it is God's special blessing to Judah, that He will not let her find her paths in following her strange lovers. 'Therefore, behold I will hedge up thy way with thorns and make a wall that she shall not find her paths. And she shall follow after her lovers, but she shall not overtake them' (Hos. 2.6-7). O thrice happy Judas, when God buildeth a double stone wall betwixt her and the fire of hell!

The world, and the things of the world, Madam, is the lover ye naturally affect beside your own husband Christ. The hedge of thorns and the wall which God buildeth in your way, to hinder you from this lover, is the thorny hedge of daily grief, loss of children, weakness of body, iniquity of the time, uncertainty of estate, lack of worldly comfort, fear of God's anger for old unrepented-of sins.

What lose ye, if God twist and plait the hedge daily thicker? God be blessed, the Lord will not let you find your paths. Return to your first husband. Do not weary, neither think that death walketh towards you with a slow pace. Ye must be riper ere ye be shaken. Your days are no longer than Job's, that were 'swifter than a post, and passed away as the ships of desire, and as the eagle that hasteth for the prey'.

There is less sand in your glass now than there was yesternight. This span-length of ever-posting time will soon be ended. But the greater is the mercy of God, the more years ye get to advise, upon what terms, and upon what conditions, ye cast your soul in the huge gulf of never-ending eternity.

The Lord hath told you what ye should be doing till He come; 'wait and hasten (saith Peter,) for the coming of the Lord'; all is night that is here, in respect of ignorance and daily ensuing troubles, one always making way to another, as the ninth wave of the sea to the tenth; therefore sigh and long for the dawning of that morning, and the breaking of that day of the coming of the Son of man, when the shadows shall flee away.

Persuade yourself the King is coming; read His letter sent before Him, 'Behold, I come quickly.' Wait with the wearied night-watch for the breaking of the eastern sky, and think that you have not a morrow. I am loath to weary you; show yourself a Christian, by suffering without murmuring; -- in patience possess your soul: they lose nothing who gain Christ. I commend you to the mercy and grace of our Lord Jesus.

wouldn't my mom just pitch a fit if she knew ...

Went to the tanner today at lunch.

By the time the Michigan mid-winter gloom has carried on this long, I'm just dying for light and warmth.

It was wonderful. I recommend it! I believe my toes may even be thawed.

Trinka

trophies

I was reading this this morning, and I thought I'd pass it along here ...

Acts 4 -
Be it known unto you all, and to all the people of Israel, that by the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom ye crucified, whom God raised from the dead, even by him doth this man stand here before you whole. … they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, (Peter and John) that they had been with Jesus. And beholding the man which was healed standing with them, they could say nothing against it.

This is where a man was healed, and stood before the authorities, and they didn't know what to make of it.

But in a larger context, when we think of the life of a Christian ... isn’t it something?

Really … we stand before them whole, and they marvel.

We stand with others who are also trophies of His grace, and nobody can deny what’s been done.

Doesn’t it just bring people to your mind?

It does to mine!

I think of the parade of beloved brothers & sisters who are pictures of restoration, and wholeness ... and there's just no explanation for it, besides God. I think of issues in MY life that had no hope outside of His intervention.

Trinka

go see this movie ...

We can complain about the trash that's being served up by Hollywood, or we can support things like this: The End of the Spear ... which will be in theaters Friday (there is a listing of locations on the site).

This will be a great encouragement. It looks as if it's well-done, and true to the facts.

Vote with your dollars folks.

Trinka

what good is it, anyway?

I've been listening to MP3s of a conference while I'm walking & lifting weights. It's the kind of teaching that brings up all kinds of old issues.

Introspection is needful in life - without it, I can go tripping through existence without a thought about things that matter - sin, repentance, God and providence, who I really am and Who He really is.

However, it can also be a pit into which we stumble, and spend wasted time lost in the dark. I already know myself well enough to know there's nothing profitable hiding in my heart somewhere.

It's hard to know whether a specific instance is the former kind of introspection, or the latter until later in life when you look back. I am praying for direction as to whether this train of thought is one I should stick with, or if I should hop off at the next stop, and look for another.

I've enjoyed time at the gym yesterday, and have been out walking. The sun has actually made an appearance several times recently, and I can tell I've been missing it. A couple years ago, I went to a tanner to prepare for a whitewater rafting trip, and the warmth & light was SUCH a mood-lifter. I'm half-considering going back just for that reason - yet it feels like a frivolous and slightly vain thing to do!

A fellow whose parents attend my church came over, and got my wireless network running, and secured yesterday. It's such a treat! God does spoil me sometimes. :)

Trinka

still out here

Really! Just not getting much done outside of work right now. One more week ... one more week ...

I'm still exercising, and still reading.

Since I'm not offering much in the way of interesting reading these days, I thought I'd share a favorite picture.


This is my dog Frances, when she was old, sitting in a field next to my mom's house. I just love the sunflowers (especially now, as the Michigan winter gloom continues).

steaks on the grill

I've been working through an online Bible study at www.settingcaptivesfree.com. There are studies related to many different areas - and I've been doing The Lord's Table related to eating & exercise.

It's been a blessing so far. There is a loosely-structured diet that goes along with it, and it has today scheduled as a day to fast.

To the Christian, a fast is more than just a day of hunger-pangs for health's sake - but it's an opportunity to have more time alone with God (since there's no time required for food preparation, consumption, or clean-up). We use the physical sensations of hunger to remind us of our spiritual hunger, and need for the Lord. It heightens our desires to worship, pray and study. Hunger reminds us of those who are hungry ALL the time physically ... due to poverty, or social ills. It reminds us of those who are hungry all the time SPIRITUALLY ... in some cases without even being aware of it. And we're driven to pray for these, and seek God in how to meet those needs.

So as I've been studying today, and been to our worship service, it has been a true blessing. I went for a walk just now, and could smell steaks cooking on a grill. (We've got sunshine today - first time in nearly a month, and everyone's giddy with it, despite the cold.)

The scent of it made me think of how smells tie in with hunger. I wasn't thinking about being physicallly hungry, until I smelled that meat cooking.

I've written here before about 2 Corinthians 2:15
For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing;

But today has me thinking about it again. To those who have been spiritually hungry for so long that they've become accustomed to it ... to those who are so busy, and surrounded by noise, that they can't notice hunger ... maybe the aroma of what they need will pique their hunger. Do I focus on Him, so that I draw others in? I want to!

Trinka

this is why I'll never invent the light bulb ...

A very nice fellow came and installed my cable internet Friday. There was a nasty nest of somethin' in the cable box, so it was a most unpleasant job.

He even gave some advice on getting the wireless router to work.

And ... later that night, I had it running and all was well!

and then ... there was today

Several people warned me that there MUST be a password on the wireless. There simply MUST be.

However, none of them seemed able to help me make it happen.

I experimented, and tweaked, and basically wasted the day, and for a time had my internet completelly shut off. Now it works, but sporadically.

I can no longer plug into the cable modem, and the wireless is sporadic. There's still no password, but I can plug into the back of the router and get a signal. I have had a LONG day.

I downloaded the router manual, but I decided to postpone reading it until a later date.

Victory - while I considered eating ice cream when I was stressed, I went for a walk instead. Also got to the gym. I find it very ironic, though, that when I went to work on my Bible study, the subject was "patience." OK. Got it God. Thanks for the reminder. :)

A lady called and asked me if I would consider being the vice-chair of our Christian Women's Ministries committee. It would mean doing a little devotional every other month, and running the meetings when the chairman is away. After today's events, I'm not feeling like much of a leader in anything, but I told her I'd pray about it and give her an answer Friday.

A friend came to watch March of the Penguins with me. (SUCH a good movie) and after telling her about the day, she said it was like Thomas Edison - he had a LOT of days like this before we got the light bulb. I'm just not inventor material, I think. I've GOT to have success, or I just don't press on well.

OK ... back to the battle ...

living on the wrong side of the river

I was reading last night about the time when the children of Israel were getting ready to cross over the Jordan river into the promised land. A couple tribes liked the land on the wrong side of the river, and wanted to claim that for themselves.

They were told they could have it, but they first had to go and fight with the others to claim the promised land.

The promised land is often a picture of our life with Christ. It's possible to be content to sit "just across the river" ... within sight of Christianity, but never get one's feet wet to actually make the commitment. Some people who are "fighting" beside us ... who have the same political views, and the same burdens for social issues ... may never have really made the west side of the Jordan their home.

So I want to remember to make them feel welcome here also! There's plenty of room ... they can claim some ground and plant petunias ... this can be "home" to any who want to get their feet wet.

Speaking of petunias ... I actually got my poor, neglected house-plants transplated. Their roots are still recovering from the shock of 10 years of neglect.

This summer, I overheard a friend out on my balcony talking to my spider plant,
"people shouldn't HAVE plants, if they're not going to take care of them. I'm sorry you suffer so."

OK. I get the picture! :)

Got a good long visit to the gym yesterday, and finally my house is reasonably clean once again. A stay-at-home day off is SO useful every now and then!

Trinka

finally, a solution!!!

I was trying to clean my shower with a goofy sponge-on-a-stick contraption I'd gotten a few years ago for a project.

The thing shredded, and my bathroom looked MUCH worse quickly!

It made me think about those elderly-people's-gadget-catalogues ... (It didn't come from one, but it's the sort of thing you see in them.)

I think the easiest job in the world would be as an advertising copywriter for those things.

The descriptions all read the same way, "FINALLY, and answer to _____(insert non-existent problem, or ridiculous "danger" here)___." Then they tell you abou this miracle, available for only $9.99.

My two favorite items for meeting non-existent needs:

*in the "imagined problem" category -- a special brush to remove lint from your dryer lint trap (there is actually one of these hanging in my building's laundry room, but I've suffered through removing the lint with my fingers rather than detouring an extra 10 feet to use the special brush.

*in the "imagined danger" category, a can-opener that doesn't make sharp edges on the cans. We all know how dangerous those cans can be. (and as a runner-up in the "imagined problem" contest, you can buy a special device to squeeze the oil out of your tuna, now that your can lid no longer fits.)

(OK ... end of cynicism ... though I may revisit this "ridiculous gadget" line of thought if I see another of those goofy catalogues!)

I had today off, and got to the gym for about an hour - felt good, and I wanted to take advantage of the emptiness of it before the students all come back with New Years' resolutions that will keep the place jam-packed for a month or so.

My internet at home still isn't working - I got the equipment and tried to get it running Friday, but there's something not working on the cable-company's end. I have a tech coming out Friday. We'll see how things go for next weekend. :)

Trinka